Posts tagged Dick Casablancas
VMI: Voluptuous Male Idiot, a recap of Play It Again Dick

A LONG TIME AGO ON THE VERONICA MARS SPIN-OFF WEB SERIES PLAY IT AGAIN DICK:

  • Ryan Hansen persuades the CW suits to let him make a pilot for a Dick Casablancas spin-off show.

  • So then he has to persuade the Veronica Mars actors to come back to reprise their roles...

  • And then they all film Private Dick! Wherein Dick Casablancas is a private detective investigating the murders of several beloved Veronica Mars characters.

  • There are masks! Punchings! Sexytimes! Pull-ups! Ghost Cassidy Casablancas! And bikinis as funeral-wear!

  • And a catchphrase that never really takes off?

  • Oh and a big dance number. Twice.

Join Jenny Owen Youngs and Helen Zaltzman to investigate the official but non-canonical Veronica Mars spin-off web series Play It Again, Dick, and contemplate such mysteries as why Madison Sinclair is the MVP of the piece, how there is so much filler in such a short show, and why the CW didn't commission a Wallace'n'cookies-focused spin-off The Great Wallace Bake-Off

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VMI 4.06 Entering a World of Pain

A LONG TIME AGO ON VERONICA MARS:

  • OK, here’s what we know about the bombings now: Big Dick did the Sea Sprite one. Clyde did the Perry Walsh one.

  • The rest are still unaccounted for - but there might be something in the FBI’s theory that a serial killer has been operating in Neptune for years, so the Marses investigate some deaths registered as accidental but maybe not.

  • Big Dick and Clyde know that Keith knows that they’ve been buying up property with all those shell companies and leaving dead ducks in Penn’s bed.

  • Places Veronica will go: the strip club, to see Vinnie; the Pi Sig house, to see some frats; Dodie and Alonzo’s room, to snoop; and Comrade Quacks, to get drunk and dance with her two sexiest friends Nicole and Leo.

  • Places Veronica won’t go: couples therapy with Logan.

  • Logan has been called back to active duty though in an undisclosed location for an undisclosed length of time, so their relationship will just have to fix itself in absentia.

  • Before he left, though, Logan managed to track down Daniel Maloof’s hacker, a neo-Nazi teen who has noticed that Daniel transferred a large amount of Bitcoin to two Mexican assassins.

  • Oh and in case you forgot, Veronica is into The Big Lebowski.

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VMI 4.05 Losing Streak

A LONG TIME AGO ON VERONICA MARS:

  • Nicole and Veronica get high together, shoot guns together, and tell each other their secrets - except one, which is that Nicole sold Comrade Quack’s to a buyer who is Richard Casablancas wearing a plastic nose and false moustache, stacked on top of two other Richard Casablancases in a really big trenchcoat.

  • Keith also does some shooting, when Clyde takes him duck hunting and leaves his phone unattended near a Mars. But the text messages Keith snoops into put him off the theory that Clyde and Big Dick are behind the bombings.

  • Instead, Keith realises all the bombs killed people who were sex offenders. Cmon, that’s just Neptune, where everyone’s on the registry! But he decides it means Nicole is the bomber, taking revenge on rapists.

  • Other tenuous bombing suspect of the week: Weevil! He’s receiving money from Clyde to sabotage the town, according to Sea Sprite Shitter Juan when Veronica puts the pressure on.

  • Then for our weekly bomb: this one goes off in Comrade Quack’s! Don’t you dare take our precious Nicole from us, show!!

  • Someone claiming to be the bomber has sent a note to the police, which keeps the murderheads busy, and forces Mayor Dobbins to streak through town!

  • Murderhead Carol deduces that the note was written by Richard Casablancas, and to celebrate, she and Penn kiss! But their passion is interrupted by a gross discovery.

  • Here are some palate cleansers though: Vinnie gets a free jacket, Alonzo and Dodie get into lavender lattes, and Cliff gets a puppy!

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audio, Season 4VMI PodVeronica Mars, season 4, Rob Thomas, Kristen Bell, Enrico Colantoni, Keith Mars, Logan Echolls, Jason Dohring, Neptune, California, Jenny Owen Youngs, Helen Zaltzman, Lo Dodds, VMI, television, TV, recap, review, drama, mystery, detective, PI, private detectives, Marshmallows, cases, crime, law, Mars Investigations, bombing, motel bombing, Sea Sprite bombing, spring break, Murderheads, bombs, Dick Casablancas, Ryan Hansen, Penn Epner, Patton Oswalt, Cliff McCormack, Daran Norris, Clyde Pickett, JK Simmons, Marcia Langdon, Dawnn Lewis, Alonzo Lozano, Clifton Collins Jr, Dodie Mendoza, Frank Gallegos, Nicole Malloy, Kirby Howell-Baptiste, Richard Casablancas, David Starzyk, Matty Ross, Izabela Vidovic, Daniel Maloof, Mido Hamada, Alex Maloof, Paul Karmiryan, Amalia Maloof, Jacqueline Antaramian, Weevil Navarro, Francis Capra, Juan Diego, Tyler Alvarez, Mercer Hayes, Ryan Devlin, Tim Foyle, James Jordan, Leo D’Amato, Max Greenfield, Vinnie Van Lowe, Ken Marino, Mayor Mark Dobbins, Andrew Friedman, Claudia Navarro, Onahoua Rodriguez, Tyler Carr, Alex Solowitz, Taylor Carr, Patrick Cox, Sarah Hyland, Max, Adam Rose, Bryce, Ian Bamberg, FBI, Chino, prison, rape, NUTT, beheading, murder, murderheads, nails, sandwiches, snacks, jackets, pizza, the ring, Wallace Fennell, Percy Daggs III, Carol, Dannah Feinglass Phirman, Shae, Kenna Wright, Mayor Dobbins, Calvin Linden, Mather Zickel, Owen, Nick Alvarez, Cassidy Casablancas, Phoenix Land Trust, property, lavender lattes, hunting, guns, shooting, bottles, ducks, dead ducks, therapy, Comrade Quacks, streaking, nudity, naked, bugs, Lorax, Loganica, vaping, vibrators, Black Mirror, bras, FBLOA, Future Business Leaders of America, Beaver, The Crucible, Dipshit Island
VMI 4.04 Heads You Lose

A LONG TIME AGO ON VERONICA MARS:

  • The themes of the season, bombs and beheadings, combine, as a spring breaker who’s been spiking women’s drinks gets a bomb strapped around his neck.

  • The Marses, Matty and the murderheads are still shuffling around their various theories about who the bomber is: Big Dick and Clyde trying to kill the Spring Break business for property prices; or the Maloofs, for reasons that nobody can really be arsed with any more.

  • Daniel Maloof is regretting ordering the hit on the Carrs, but too late! Dodie and Alonzo have video of them killing them…

  • ...but one has survived? What a twist!

  • Not enough jerks for you? This episode features the reappearances of ugh Mercer and Lucky-in-a-wig and Toxic Max!

  • But in compensation we also see Vinnie, and... LEO! He’s now an FBI agent and divorcé with a jacket full of snacks, there to tempt Veronica as she struggles with domestic bliss with Logan.

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VMI 4.03 Keep Calm and Party On

• Daniel Maloof’s having a shit one. He is being blackmailed because he was videoed masturbating to a cam girl. He’s still being accused of murder by Penn all over the TV. He is kidnapped, strung up, stoned and dickpunched by the Carrs. Then he is rescued by Alonzo and Dodie, who are going to kill him - but Daniel turns the tables! And the other side is also really shitty.
• Sea Sprite Bombing Suspect of the Week is Matty’s pick: mole-having gum vending machine-filling Perry, who blows himself up when the police come for him.
• But Veronica doesn’t buy that he’s a culprit, and with another bomb going off at the end of the episode, the mystery continues. Unsurprisingly.
• More surprising is that Veronica actually has some fun! She gets to try on Nicole’s punching gloves, drop some E, dance dance dance - then puke puke puke the next morning.
• Keith’s also having fun - he and Clyde bond over golf!
• And Penn and his group of Murderheads are, unfortunately, still in our lives, dredging up Lilly Kane’s murder, advancing some wild theories about the Sea Sprite bomber - but one does give Veronica the link between the bombing and El Despiadado.

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VMI 4.02 Chino and the Man

A LONG TIME AGO ON VERONICA MARS:

  • Pizza delivery Penn is making the most of his post-bombing notoriety - he’s on TV accusing Congressman Daniel Maloof of murdering his brother’s girlfriend Tawny!

  • Matty from the motel is doing her own detectiving - maybe whoever refilled the vending machine put some exploding gum in there! Her investigation leads her to Liam Fitzpatrick urghhhh, but phew, Veronica rescues her.

  • And the Maloofs are rescued from Tawny’s violent family by Logan doing some professional punching.

  • He also punches his kitchen cabinet, as Veronica is hot for angry violent Logan, not reasonable calm Logan who is taking therapy seriously.

  • In other news, Big Dick has a ‘Big Dick’ tattoo, and a mysterious prison buddy and fixer Clyde. We don’t know what Clyde’s deal is, we just know that he definitely has one.

  • And Dick Casablancas is an action movie star now! Sure, why not.

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VMI 4.01 Spring Break Forever

A LONG TIME AGO ON VERONICA MARS:

  • SPRING BREAK!! Neptune is full of douchey boys and drunk girls, what could possibly go wrong??

  • What goes wrong? A bomb goes off at the party motel, that’s what’s wrong! Killing four people, one of whom is the nephew of El Despiadado, a MEXICAN CRIME LORD oh Rob Thomas, must we?

  • We must, and El Despiadado must send two guys to Neptune to chop off the head of whoever’s responsible for the bombing.

  • But they’re not the only family with a stake in this crime: the brother of congressman Daniel Maloof lost his hand and his fiancee, and the Maloofs hire the Marses to investigate. And Matty, the teenage daughter of the motel owner who died, is tugging at Veronica’s heartstrings.

  • We also meet some new characters: pizza delivery guy Patton Oswalt - er, Penn; Mr Hu, whose supermarket is being sabotaged with rats; and super cool bar owner Nicole, who sure can punch.

  • Plus we have the return of ambulance-chasing Cliff; a still-recovering Keith; and Big Dick Casablancas, who’s campaigning to Make Neptune Great Again.

  • Logan is also back, and he proposes to Veronica! What a prick! And he plays with Wallace’s baby! Ugh how dare he!

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VMI: The Thousand Dollar Tan Line

A LONG TIME AGO ON VERONICA MARS: The Thousand Dollar Tan Line, an original mystery by Rob Thomas and Jennifer Graham:

  • Two months have passed since the movie, and it’s SPRING BREAK! Neptune’s popping off! Until two young women disappear, first Hayley and then Aurora, presumed kidnapped.

  • The spring breakers stay away and the Neptune Grand is losing business, so the glamorous owner hires Veronica to investigate the disappearances.

  • This case means Veronica gets back into her sexy disguises to infiltrate house parties run by the heirs to a Mexican drug cartel.

  • Lamb doesn’t care about the Mexican drug cartel heirs, and neither should you because - BIG TWIST - they have nothing to do with it! They’re just rich guys throwing parties. Turns out, Hayley went off to Bakersfield and was murdered by her jealous boyfriend :(

  • And, BIG TWIST, Aurora is part of her own kidnapping plot with her scammer dad, who she’s also double-crossing to get the ransom money!

  • Oh and BIG TWIST, Aurora’s stepmom is LIANNE MARS!

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VMI: the movie, part 2

A LONG TIME AGO ON VERONICA MARS:

  • Veronica has choices to make! NYC or Neptune? Lawyering or detectiving? Piz or Logan? Try to guess, go on, guess.

  • Armed with her favourite tools, a bug, a long lens and a taser, Veronica closes in on Carrie’s murderer...

  • ...And it’s not any of the candidates you thought it might be in the first half of the movie - it’s the guy you barely saw at all, Cobb! Who? Cobb! You remember Cobb.

  • Cobb!

  • The death toll rises - Deputy Sacks, Gia, possibly a cat - and our beloved Keith ends up in ICU.

  • Sheriff Dan Lamb is happy to frame Logan, doesn’t want to catch the real killer, and plants a gun in Weevil’s hand to make it look like Celeste shot him in self-defence. Veronica can’t resist getting her teeth into all that Neptune corruption.

Join Jenny Owen Youngs and Helen Zaltzman to investigate the second half of Veronica Mars: the 2014 movie, and delve into such mysteries as: and delve into such mysteries as how long Pizvonica have been a thing, why Sweaty Luke is just there for some kind of gross 1950s-style plot, and whether these kids ever needed to cover up Susan's death at all, but especially after the statute of limitations has elapsed.

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VMI: the movie, part 1

A LONG TIME AGO ON VERONICA MARS:

  • 91,585 fans missed the show so much that they kickstarted a movie! So off we all go back to Neptune to see some old pals, like Wallace! Principal Clemmons! Gia Goodman! Sweaty Luke! Corny! Aaaand Logan being suspected of murder.

  • Plus some new pals, like Mac’s hot new hair! Piz’s boss Ira Glass! a new Sheriff Lamb who is just as shitty as the old Sheriff Lamb! And an intense Logan fan in a wig.

  • We’re not so pleased to see the Pizvonica sex tape again, and it causes a big punchup at the high school reunion.

  • We also reluctantly reunite with Celeste Kane, as she shoots the now upstanding husband and dad Weevil.

  • And even though Veronica’s supposedly happy living in New York City, in a relationship with Piz, about to become a big shot lawyer, you know she can’t resist a Logan in distress.

Join Jenny Owen Youngs and Helen Zaltzman to investigate the first half of Veronica Mars: the 2014 movie, and delve into such mysteries as: how Keith has such a spacious lovely home these days, Dax Shepard's van, why Mac and Wallace force the heinous reunion on Veronica and poor poor Piz, and leg erotica.

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